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Ganbare Goemon Uchukaizoku Akogingu - Konami - PSX - 1996

"They made a Goemon game for the Playstation?" This is what words escaped my mouth when I saw this game listed at an import store online (the full title is Ganbare Goemon Uchukaizoku Akogingu, which translates roughly to Let's Go Goemon: Space Pirate Akogingu). Curious, I decided to track it down. For those many, many people that have never experienced the Goemon games, they go back a long ways. Way back to the old Japanese/European home computer, the MSX actually. From then on, several Famicom and Super Famicom games were released. There were a few that came out in the United States under the title The Legend of the Mystical Ninja (the excellent SNES game a few years back, and most recently, the Nintendo 64 and Gameboy games). I didn't have a clue what it was going to be like, but if it was anything like the SNES game, I knew I'd be in for a treat.

And boy, am I ever glad that I took that chance. Ganbare Goemon is an incredibly fun title that I dare call one of the best 2D platformers on the Playstation.

Since I have very little knowledge of Japanese, I really know very little about the plot...something about an alien spaceship crashing to the ground in Ancient Japan. Goemon and Ebisimaru (known idiotically as Kid Yang and Dr. Ying in the SNES title, thank God they changed their names back in the N64 game) decide to track it down. Eventually you get transported to an alien planet and zoom up into outer space to do battle with a maniacal clown named Akogingu. That's about all I can gather.

There are actually two perspectives...an overhead view that uses a Mode 7 like effect to creat the illusion of depth, and you standard side-scrolling levels. It's almost like an RPG...you gain experience points (to upgrade your weapons) and money (gee, I wonder what for), and various "puzzles" must be solved. Often time these "puzzles" consist of no more than bringing a certain object to a certain place, but it's made all the more difficult by the language barrier (the beginning is near impossible if you don't know Japanese...for your information, to get past that boulder at the beginning, jump in front of one of the small statues a few times. Thanks to RPGFan for helping me with that.) But more often than not, if you just stumble around, you're bound to figure out what to do and where to go. There are also little cat statues hidden around the levels. Obtain four of them and you gain another heart on your life meter.

Goemon has his standard pipe weapon and can throw coins. Ebisimaru has a punching glove that can be used to swing on hooks (a la the NES classic Bionic Commando) as well as shurikens. Additionally, there are two totally new characters that make their appearance : Goroku, a huge green-bearded fellow that can punch through rocks, and an alien chap named Baban, who whacks enemies with his cane (my translation on those names could be incredibly off though.) All of the projectile weapons can be charged up by holding down the attack button...it's vital to know this to get past certain parts of the game. The ninja woman Yae and the clockwork ninja Sasuke also make appearances, but you can't play as them and I'm really not sure what part in the plot they play.

The Goemon games have always had a certain charm to them. Part of it comes from the ancient Japanese setting....you'd expect some sort of serious samurai theme like Bushido Blade. But this is far from the case. They've always been extremely wacky and this chapter is no different. All of the characters have a cartoonish look and many of the bad guys are just plain weird. Like the set of five ninjas that bear a strange resemblance to the Power Rangers. Or ninjas that start to sniffle and then start bawling uncontrollably when you hit them. Or even the bushes that have sirens attached to them. It's all gloriously wacky, and this is probably the reason why it was never translated into English. I really wish it they had...some of the pre-boss battle conversations seem like they would be funny if I could read them. Some humor is universal though (we also learn that Goemon sleeps in the nude...I've no idea why I decided to bring that up just now.)

Like Mystical Ninja for the SNES, there are a few mini-games, but they aren't really bonus extras you can play at your leisure...like Final Fantasy 7, they're part of the plot. One of them involves the piloting of your robot, the Impact (a huge, goofy looking mechanical contruction that bears an odd resemblance to the title character) through water, smashing any bad guys with your arms, in an odd Godzilla-like parody. It gets even wackier when you the game switches to a first-person perspective, where you get to shoot coins and use you "nuclear hammer blast" to repel enemies (this is the only part of the game that uses polygons, actually.) Hands down my favorite one is a Gradius-like shooter where you pilot a turtle through an underwater segment.

Since this is a fairly old Playstation title, you shouldn't expect much from the graphics. Still, they carry the same sort of goofiness that the rest of the series did. And I absolutely love the music. All of the original tunes (like the first action tune) are marvelous, and there are even some remixes of older Goemon themes (if you've played any of the Famicom ones, you'll recognize them.) One of the coolest pieces of music is a dance tune that plays when you fight a boss near the end of the game (replete with disco balls and flashing lights...it's probably best that you don't ask.) And all of the sound effects fit the game perfectly, although some voice acting would've been nice (doesn't matter that I wouldn't have understood it......)

The game isn't 100% perfect. On the overhead screens, you see all four characters onscreen at the same time. This may not seem like a big deal, but it can cause TONS of slowdown at one particular part of the game (and makes playing this section almost painful.) Plus once you figure the game out, it isn't horribly long. And finally, THERE'S NO TWO PLAYER MODE! Why???

Is this title worth importing? Yes. Oh God, yes. If you love 2D platformers as much as I do, any person owning a modded Playstation owes it to themself to pick this one up. It's the best side-scrolling fun I've had on the PS since I first played Castlevania: Symphony of the Night.

- Kurt

For more info on Ganbare Goemon Uchukaizoku Akogingu, head over to
The Mystical Web Site of Goemon